Slow Strip Dance Jokes
Adam and Eve virus: Takes a couple of bytes out of your Apple.
Airline virus: You're in Dallas, but your data is in Singapore.
Anita Hill virus: Lies dormant for ... keep reading.
1. If using a touch-tone, press random numbers while ordering. Ask the person taking the order to stop doing that.
2. Make up a charge-card name. Ask if they accept it.
3. Use ... keep reading.
Is Windows Operating System a virus?
With the recent problems being encountered by Windows users all across the country, people are begin to ask themselves if windows is a virus. ... keep reading.
A passenger train is creeping along, slowly. Finally it creaks to a halt. A passenger sees a conductor walking by outside.
"What's going on?" she yells out the window.
"Cow ... keep reading.
A man and his wife are driving down the road when a cop pulls them over. The cop says to the man, "Do you know that you were speeding?" The ... keep reading.
Q. Why did the man put his money in the freezer?
A. He wanted cold hard cash!
Q. What did the porcupine say to the cactus?
A. "Is that you ... keep reading.
Speak in a strange foreign accent. when someone asks where you are from, name a country only you can pronounce.
Use a different accent every time you talk to someone ... keep reading.
A man from Texas buys a round of drinks for everyone in the bar as he announces his wife has just produced "A typical Texas baby boy weighing twenty pounds." ... keep reading.
Once there was a little boy who was curious about what a strip club was like so one day he decided to sneak into one. Once he was in, he ... keep reading.
A couple was invited to a swanky masked Halloween Party. She got a terrible headache and told her husband to go to the party alone. He, being a devoted husband, ... keep reading.
On hearing that her elderly grandfather had just passed away, Katie went straight to her grandparent's house to visit her 95 year old grandmother and comfort her.
When she asked how ... keep reading.
A blonde and a brunette are running a ranch together in Louisiana. They decide they need a bull to mate with their cows to increase their herd. The brunette takes ... keep reading.
A Scotish man was at a baseball game.
It was the first time he had ever seen the sport so he sat quietly. The first batter approached the mound, he ... keep reading.
How do you make a kleenex dance?
You put a little boogie in it. keep reading.
A blonde named Anna had a near death experience. The other day when she went horseback riding. Everything was going fine until the horse started bouncing out of control. She ... keep reading.
One day a farmer decided that he wanted to expand his chicken farming. In order to do this he would need a stud rooster. He asked around his fellow farmers ... keep reading.
I'm hungry = I'm hungry
I'm tired = I'm tired
Do you want to go to a movie? = I'd eventually like to have sex with you
Can I take you out to ... keep reading.
When you take a long time, you're slow.
When your boss takes a long time, he's thorough.
When you don't do it, you're lazy.
When your boss doesn't do it, ... keep reading.
My husband and I were in the car heading home from a weekend trip out of town.
We needed gasoline, so I stopped at a gas station just off the ... keep reading.
Two hungry cannibals are walking through the forest when they see a man who had recently passed away.
One cannibal says, "Look at this! You start at the feet and ... keep reading.
A FIREMAN came home from work one day and told his wife, "You know, we have a wonderful system at the fire station: BELL 1 rings and we all put on ... keep reading.
Joe grew up in a small town, then moved away to attend college and law school. He decided to come back to the small town because he could be a ... keep reading.