Have you ever spoken and wished that you could immediately take the words back...or that you could crawl into a hole? Here are the Testimonials of a few people ... keep reading.
Tennessee: A man successfully broke into a bank after hours and stole the bank's video camera, while the camera was remotely recording. (That is, the videotape recorder was located elsewhere ... keep reading.
When our second child was on the way, my wife and I attended a pre-birth class aimed at couples who had already had at least one child.
The instructor raised ... keep reading.
How you can spot a Canadian, eh? -Don McGillivray (Ottawa columnist for Southam Newspapers)
How do you tell a Canadian from an American?
It used to be enough ... keep reading.
Man Gives Up On Women
April 10, 2003 - Atlanta, USA
Atlanta native auto mechanic Michael Ross publicly declares that he has given up the life long struggle to figure out what ... keep reading.
One night, a Delta twin-engine puddle jumper was flying somewhere above New Jersey. There were five people on board: the pilot, Michael Jordan, Bill Gates, the Dali Lama, and a ... keep reading.
God said to Adam, "I've got some good news and some bad news. First the good news. I have given you a brain and a penis. The bad news... I've ... keep reading.
A woman posts an ad in the news paper that looks like this...
'Looking for man with these qualifications; won't beat me up; or run away from me and is ... keep reading.
An artist asked the gallery owner if there had been any interest in his paintings currently on display. "I've got good news and bad news," the owner replied. "The good ... keep reading.
The patient says, "Give me the bad news first!"
Doctor replies, "You've got AIDS."
"Oh, no! What could be worse than that?" asks the patient.
"You've also got Alzheimer's Disease."
... keep reading.
Two guys in a bar are watching the TV. There is a news report about a man who threatens to jump off a 5 story building unless the cops give him 3000 ... keep reading.
Put on your glasses. Double check that your partner is actually in bed with you.
Set timer for 10 minutes, in case you doze off in the middle.
Set the mood ... keep reading.
This woman goes into a dentist's office, after he is through examining her he says: "I am sorry to tell you this, but I am going to have to drill ... keep reading.
Mr. Jones gets a call from the hospital. They tell him his wife's been in a terrible car accident. He rushes to the hospital, runs in to the ER and ... keep reading.
This guy went to hospital for a circumcision, but because of a mix up, he ended up having a complete sex change.
All of the doctors and nurses had gathered ... keep reading.
The newly wed wife said to her husband when he returned from work, "I have great news for you. Pretty soon we're going to be three in this house instead ... keep reading.
A man was summoned to his attorney's office. "Do you want the bad news first or the terrible news?" the lawyer said.
"Give me the bad news first." "Your wife ... keep reading.
A man went to the doctor's. The doctor came in and said, "Well, I've got some good news and some bad news."
The bad news is that you have an ... keep reading.
Two friends are playing golf one day when one of them says to the other," I love golf, I hope that when we die there is golf in heaven." The ... keep reading.
During a recent public outing, Hillary slipped off to visit a fortune teller of some local repute. In a dark and hazy room, peering into a crystal ball, the mystic ... keep reading.
Great news! Some of the old favorite singers and bands have re-released
their great hits with new titles and lyrics to accommodate their aging
Herman's Hermits: "Mrs. ... keep reading.
On News Years Eve, a thin and bony husband is walking around in the house wearing only his boxers.
His wife comes out of the kitchen and says, "Hey, the ... keep reading.
1 slice whole wheat toast
8 oz. skim milk
4 oz. lean broiled chicken breast
1 cup steamed spinach
1 cup herb tea
1 Oreo cookie
The rest of Oreos in ... keep reading.
"I think I have a problem, Doc," says a patient. "One of my balls has turned blue."
The doctor examines the man briefly and concludes that the patient will die ... keep reading.