Three Old Ladies
I am not forgetful
Three ladies were discussing the travails of getting older. One said, "Sometimes I catch myself with a jar of mayonnaise in my hand, while standing in front of the refrigerator, and I can't remember whether I need to put it away, or start making a sandwich."
The second lady chimed in with, "Yes, sometimes I find myself on the landing of the stairs and can't remember whether I was on my way up or on my way down."
The third one responded, " Well, ladies, I'm glad I don't have that problem. Knock on wood," as she rapped her knuckles on the table, and then said, "That must be the door, I'll get it!"
Three ladies were discussing the travails of getting older. One said, "Sometimes I catch myself with a jar of mayonnaise in my hand, while standing in front of the refrigerator, and I can't remember whether I need to put it away, or start making a sandwich."
The second lady chimed in with, "Yes, sometimes I find myself on the landing of the stairs and can't remember whether I was on my way up or on my way down."
The third one responded, " Well, ladies, I'm glad I don't have that problem. Knock on wood," as she rapped her knuckles on the table, and then said, "That must be the door, I'll get it!"
4,147 views
Rate this joke:
4/5 from 77 votes
Three old ladies discuss what happens to them now that they've gotten older.
Category: women jokes
Similar Jokes
-
Nuns Comin' Back
Three Italian nuns die and go to heaven. At the Pearly Gates, they are met by St. Peter. He says "Sisters, you all led such wonderful lives that I'm granting ... keep reading.
-
Tickle Me Almo
Tickle Me Almo A very modest lady applied for a job at the factory where they made "Tickle Me Elmo" dolls. It was Friday and almost quitting time, and hurriedly ... keep reading.
-
What Men Are Like
Men are like department stores.... their clothes should always be half off. Men are like vacations.... they never seem to be long enough. Men are like computers... hard to figure ... keep reading.
-
Knitting Mess Up
Three women were in the waiting room of a gynaecologist, and each of them was knitting a sweater for their baby-to-be. The first one stopped and took a pill. "What ... keep reading.
-
Your Half Brothers
One day a girl brings home her boyfriend and tells her father she wants to marry him. After talking to him for while, he tells his daughter she can't do ... keep reading.
-
Janet Reno's Advice
First Lady Hillary Clinton and Attorney General Janet Reno were having one of those girl to girl talks, and Hillary says to Janet, "You're lucky that you don't have to ... keep reading.
-
Falling Questions
A woman was shaking out a rug on the balcony of her 17th floor condominium when a sudden gust of wind blew her over the railing. "Damn, that was stupid," ... keep reading.
-
Relationship Help Book
"My wife suggested a book for me to read to enhance our relationship. It's titled: 'Women are from Venus, Men are Wrong.'" keep reading.
-
A Perfect Car For Her
A lady walks into a Lexus dealership. She browses around, then spots the perfect car and walks over to inspect it. As she bends to feel the fine leather upholstery, ... keep reading.
-
Woman's Glass Eye
A man walked into a bar and sat down beside a women. Suddenly her glass eye popped out and he caught it. She thanked him and asked him if he ... keep reading.
-
Some Drug Side Effects
A woman went to her doctor for a follow-up visit after the doctor had prescribed testosterone (a male hormone) for her. She was a little worried about some of the ... keep reading.
-
Computer Gender
A language instructor was explaining to her class that French nouns, unlike their English counterparts, are grammatically designated as masculine or feminine. Things like 'chalk' or 'pencil,' she described, ... keep reading.
-
I Have Cold Hands
Two young lovers go up to the mountains for a romantic winter vacation. When they get there the guy goes out to chop some wood. When he gets back, he ... keep reading.
-
Into S and M
Sue and Sally meet at their 30th class reunion, and they haven't seen each other since graduation. They begin to talk and bring each other up to date. The conversation ... keep reading.
-
A New Nursing Home
A family took their frail, elderly mother to a nursing home and left her, hoping she would be well cared for. The next morning, the nurses bathed her, fed her ... keep reading.
-
Dentist's News
This woman goes into a dentist's office, after he is through examining her he says: "I am sorry to tell you this, but I am going to have to drill ... keep reading.
