Kid's One-Liners

Q. Why did the man put his money in the freezer?

A. He wanted cold hard cash!



Q. What did the porcupine say to the cactus?

A. "Is that you mommy?"



Q. What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire?

A. Frostbite.




Q. How do crazy people go through the forest?

A. They take the psycho path.



Q. What do prisoners use to call each other?

A. Cell phones.



Q. What do you get from a pampered cow?

A. Spoiled milk.



Q. Where do polar bears vote?

A. The North Poll



Q. What did Geronimo say when he jumped out of the airplane?

A. ME!!!



Q. Where do snowmen keep their money?

A. In snow banks.



Q. What's brown and sticky?

A. A stick.



Q. Why do sea-gulls fly over the sea?

A. Because if they flew over the bay they would be bagels!



Q. What dog keeps the best time?

A. A watch dog.



Q. Why did the tomato turn red?

A. It saw the salad dressing!



Q. What did the grape do when it got stepped on?

A. It let out a little wine!



Q. How do you make a tissue dance?

A. Put a little boogey in it!



Q. Where do bees go to the bathroom?

A. At the BP station!



Q. What did the judge say when the skunk walked in the court room?

A. Odor in the court.



Q. What did the water say to the boat?

A. Nothing, it just waved.



Q. What did the fish say when he swam into the wall?

A. Dam!



Q. Why don't skeletons fight each other?

A. They don't have the guts.