Just Like A Baby
A young couple were on their way to Vegas to get married. Before getting there, the girl said to the guy that she had a confession to make. The reason that they have not been too intimate is because she is very flat chested.
"If you want to cancel the wedding, then I'll understand," she said. The guy remarked, "I don't mind that you're flat, and sex is not the most important thing in a marriage anyway."
Several miles down the road, the guy turned to the girl and said that he also had a confession to make. The reason that they have not been too intimate is because he is just like a baby below the waist. The girl remarked, "I don't mind that like a baby below the
waist, and sex is not the most important thing in a marriage anyway."
And so, the happy couple went on to Vegas and got married. On their wedding night, the girl took off her clothes. True to her word, she is as flat as a washboard. Then, the guy took
off his clothes. After one glance at his naked body, the girl fainted and fell to the floor.
When she regained consciousness, the guy said, "I told you before we got married, so why were you so surprised?"
"You told me it was just like a baby." The guy replied, "It is! 8 pounds and 21 inches long!"
"If you want to cancel the wedding, then I'll understand," she said. The guy remarked, "I don't mind that you're flat, and sex is not the most important thing in a marriage anyway."
Several miles down the road, the guy turned to the girl and said that he also had a confession to make. The reason that they have not been too intimate is because he is just like a baby below the waist. The girl remarked, "I don't mind that like a baby below the
waist, and sex is not the most important thing in a marriage anyway."
And so, the happy couple went on to Vegas and got married. On their wedding night, the girl took off her clothes. True to her word, she is as flat as a washboard. Then, the guy took
off his clothes. After one glance at his naked body, the girl fainted and fell to the floor.
When she regained consciousness, the guy said, "I told you before we got married, so why were you so surprised?"
"You told me it was just like a baby." The guy replied, "It is! 8 pounds and 21 inches long!"
4,168 views
Rate this joke:
3/5 from 41 votes
A man and a woman get married but tell each other about themselves a bit before. (Dirty Joke)
Category: marriage jokes
Similar Jokes
-
Marriage And Money
A husband and wife were having difficulty surviving financially so they decided that the wife should try prostitution as an extra source of income. The husband drove her out to ... keep reading.
-
What Are We Eating?
A hunter kills a deer and brings it home. He decides to clean and serve the venison for supper. He knows his kids are fussy eaters, and won't eat it ... keep reading.
-
Bell 1
A FIREMAN came home from work one day and told his wife, "You know, we have a wonderful system at the fire station: BELL 1 rings and we all put on ... keep reading.
-
Three Marriages
Three sisters wanted to get married, but their parents couldn't afford it so they had all of them on the same day. They also couldn't afford to go on a ... keep reading.
-
A Firm Pinch
One morning while making breakfast, a man walked up to his wife and pinched her on her butt and said, "You know if you firmed this up we could get ... keep reading.
-
Married Camping Trip
A couple went on vacation to a fishing resort up north. The husband liked to fish at the crack of dawn; the wife preferred to read. One morning the husband ... keep reading.
-
What If You Didn't See Me?
A man left for work one Friday afternoon. But it was payday, so instead of going home, he stayed out the entire weekend partying with the boys and spending his ... keep reading.
-
New Bride Asks
The bride tells her husband, "Honey, you know I'm a virgin and I don't know anything about sex. Can you explain it to me first?" "OK, Sweetheart. Putting it simply, ... keep reading.
-
Poor Country Pastor
The poor country pastor was livid when he confronted his wife with the receipt for a $250 dress she had bought. "How could you do this!" he exclaimed. "I don't know," ... keep reading.
-
An Old Driving Couple
An elderly couple were driving across the country. The woman was driving when she got pulled over by the highway patrol. The officer said, "Ma'am did you know you were ... keep reading.
-
Caterpillars Taste Good?
Johnny: Daddy, are caterpillars good to eat? Father: Have I not told you never to mention such things during meals! Mother: Why did you say that, Junior? Why did you ... keep reading.
-
Funny Marriage Quotes
Marriage is not a word. It is a sentence--a life sentence. Marriage is very much like a violin; after the sweet music is over, the strings are attached. Marriage is ... keep reading.
-
Money Saving Sex
As a painless way to save money, a young couple arranged that every time they have sex the husband puts his pocket change into a china piggy bank on the ... keep reading.
-
He Said She Said Joke
He said. . . I don't know why you wear a bra; you've got nothing to put in it. She said . . . You wear pants don't you? He said . . . Since I first laid ... keep reading.
-
Senior's Sex Guide
Put on your glasses. Double check that your partner is actually in bed with you. Set timer for 10 minutes, in case you doze off in the middle. Set the mood ... keep reading.
-
Wife's In A Coma
A husband is visiting his wife in hospital where she has been in a coma for several years. On this visit he decides to rub her left breast instead of ... keep reading.
