I Need A Laser Sight
a man walks into a gunshop and says to the attendant, "i need a laser sight, do you have any?" the attendant replies, "yes here's our last one." the man is looking through it when he spies a naked man and woman running around in a top floor of a house. "oh shit, look at this." the attendant looks, and sees his wife with another man, "that's my fucking wife. if you can shoot the man in the dick and the woman in the head i'll give you that gun on the wall, the laser sights and a load of bullets." "ok," he says, so he lines up his shot and shoots. "oh look, got 'em both in one."
2,993 views
Rate this joke:
3/5 from 19 votes
A man walks into a gunshop and just wants a laser sight and yet he gets a bit more than he bargained for.
Category: men jokes
Similar Jokes
-
Husbands Nasty Farts
Herman and Martha were happily married for nearly forty years. The only friction in their marriage was caused by the husband's habit of breaking wind nearly every morning as he ... keep reading.
-
Pumpkin Love
A man was driving home late one night and was feeling very horny. As he was passing a pumpkin patch, his mind started to wander. He thought to himself, you ... keep reading.
-
Bet On Jumping
Two guys in a bar are watching the TV. There is a news report about a man who threatens to jump off a 5 story building unless the cops give him 3000 ... keep reading.
-
Because I'm A Guy
Because I'm a guy, I must hold the television remote control in my hand while I watch TV. If the thing has been misplaced, I'll miss a whole show looking ... keep reading.
-
Disabled Swim
Three guys enter a disabled swimming contest. The first has no arms. The second no legs and the third has no body, just a head. They all line up, the ... keep reading.
-
The Bad Check
A news story said the police caught a guy trying to cash a phony check and took him down to the station. While the officers were distracted, the crook grabbed ... keep reading.
-
Wife With My Best Friend
A guy walked into a bar and ordered a triple scotch. The bartender poured him the drink and the guy drank it down in one gulp. "Wow," said the bartender. "... keep reading.
-
Looks Of Your Wife
After completing his examination, the doctor took her husband aside. "I don't like the looks of your wife at all." "Me neither, Doc." Said the husband. "But she's a good ... keep reading.
-
Golfing Hitman
Two old friends were just about to tee off at the first hole of their local golf course when a chap carrying a golf bag called out to them, "Do ... keep reading.
-
A Few Lost in the Desert
An Englishman, a Texan and a Polak are lost in the Nevada desert. After days without water or food they come upon a lamp half buried in the sand. They ... keep reading.
-
A Sleeping Scotsman
A kilted Scotsman was walking down a country path after finishing off a large amount of whisky at a local pub. He felt quite sleepy and decided to nap against ... keep reading.
-
Making The Ferry
This guy loved living on Staten Island, but he wasn't crazy about the ferry. If you missed a ferry late at night, you had to spend the next hour or ... keep reading.
-
Cola Company Duties
A man got a job in the sales promotion department of a cola soft-drink company. When he asked about his duties, the manager explained. "Oh! It's an easy job! All ... keep reading.
-
A Lawyers Valentines Day
A guy walks into a post office one day to see a middle-aged, balding man standing at the counter methodically placing "Love" stamps on bright pink envelopes with hearts all ... keep reading.
-
How Dogs And Men Are Same
How Dogs and Men Are the Same 1. Both take up too much space on the bed. 2. Both have irrational fears about vacuum cleaning. 3. Both mark their territory. 4. Neither tells you ... keep reading.
-
Won't Go To Jail
A man who had been caught embezzling millions from his employer went to a lawyer seeking defense. He didn?t want to go to jail. But his lawyer told him, "... keep reading.
